Society tells us that the family is being shattered and ripped apart. In the midst of the family decline I thought I would post 5 qualities that, if practiced,  will help our families grow stronger in the midst of great turmoil. There is reason to place hope back in the family if these 5 qualities are practiced.

Professor Nick Stinnett created an insightful study some years ago. Many different kinds of questions were asked to families from many backgrounds, cultures, and countries. His research represented a wide range of the families of humanity. What was his goal? He wanted to discover what makes a family strong.

Dr. Stinnett writes of his findings:

All together, we studied 3,000 families and collected a lot of information. But when we analyzed it all, we found six main qualities in strong families. Strong families:

•    are committed to the family,
•    spend time together,
•    have good family communication,
•    express appreciation to each other,
•    gave a spiritual commitment, and are able to solve problems in a crisis.¹

Take a moment and think about your family. Have you lost hope? Is your family to busy? Are you practicing these 5 qualities daily? When these qualities are put into practice the family will grow stronger. Maybe implementing these qualities, with the help of God, could even save your family from divorce. I challenge you to sit down with your spouse tonight and walk through these 5 qualities. It is time to make some changes. Do it today.

I have been trying to show Gracie-Beth that she is to be treasured and valued by all. The world we live in can often look at a woman as an object to be exploited. Little girls are taught what to wear to attract attention, to find their value in popularity and clothes, and to use the correct language. Women are devalued, called to compromise integrity, and then raped of their innocents. The sad part is that we, as parents, have or are allowing this to happen. We shove them into the latest trends of fashion, TV, or activity without a second thought. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying to shield our children from everything, but these things should never replace the practical lessons a parent can teach his/her child. So we need to carefully ask ourselves why we have our children in a certain activity, dressing a certain way, or encouraging them to watch certain TV shows or movies. We, as parents, have the blessing of building our children up through “teaching moments” that will help spurn them onto not only great things but self confident and valued children/adolescents/young adults/and adults. Allow me the chance to share just one key teaching moment that all parents should have with their daughters.

The other day I wanted to do something special for Gracie-Beth. In the past I have done things like play princess & prince with her (teaching her chivalry), taught her about honesty, and shown her what it means to be defended when picked on. We pray together and she asks for a blessing every night. The other day I picked her up from school and drove her to a flower shop. As soon as I pulled in to the parking lot, she immediately exclaimed, “It’s the castle with flowers in it!”

I looked at her and told her, “Gracie-Beth, Daddy wants to buy you a flower because I love you”.

It was at that moment, with her reaction, that I began to understand just how much my Gracie-Beth felt valued through a flower. The best way I can describe her reaction to even the thought of getting a flower is that everything in her body literally blushed from the inside out. My daughter was aglow. She put her hands over her face and acted shy. So I asked her what color flower she would like, to which of course, she said pink. We walked in and ordered her a pink rose and then mommy a dozen red roses. As we waited, we walked around the flower shop looking at all the beautiful flowers. I noticed the way she held my hand as we walked through the flower shop. It was very different from the way she holds my hand to cross the street. Instead, she grabbed my hand, and then with her other arm, grabbed my entire arm. It was as if she was a splint on my leg. She just wanted to be close to the one that valued her.

Isn’t that the way we are in life? We run towards those we value. As Christians, we should always be in a state of “closeness” with God. However, we find ourselves all too often running toward those things or people that make us temporarily feel good about ourselves. As I looked down at my daughter, I was reminded that I have the continued responsibility to teach her how to find her value in God. The best way for her to see and learn this is through this father demonstrating the value that God has placed upon her.

The roses were ready, so we paid for them and got back into the car. Noticing the importance of the moment, we talked about why Daddy gives Mommy flowers and why she is valued. All day long she showed everyone her rose. I know that I will not be able to shield her from all the cruel things in this world, but for this day, I saw her being loved and valued. Allow me to ask you a question as a parent…are you creating those “teaching moments” for your children? Do it today and it just may change your child’s life.